For Christmas Funnsies

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Duh, the Nog is gross. Hot Chocolate... extra chocolatey.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Depends on the gift. Mostly wrapped... the night before Christmas, by Santa herself.

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? white. Because the tree I took off my neighbor's curb came pre-lit with white. Yes, he was tossing a surprisingly nice artificial tree. I was just helping reduce landfill waste. And white lights on the house make me think of snow... I do like the big old fashioned colored bulbs, but have yet to acquire any.

4. Do you hang mistletoe? Negative. I eat a lot of garlic and onions so my husband probably isn't missing out.

5. When do you put your decorations up? If I am in the mood, the weekend after Thanksgiving.

6. What is your favorite holiday dish? Christmas morning Mimosa... but, I guess that doesn't really count. How about my mum's cranberry bread as a close second.

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child? Touchy subject... not much to refer to. I suppose our traditional Christmas Eve family gathering was pretty memorable. Also, I remember my mom putting out a new decoration each day, and trying to find what it was... and Christmas morning stockings where my favorite. Which is probably why I spend so much time filling stockings to perfection every Christmas Eve.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? What do you mean? Is there something I should know? Haha. My mom was a kill-joy and never had us believe in the myth that is Santa... and now I am that same kill-joy with my kids. Maybe it has to do with being truthful in everything, and not focusing Christmas on a fictional character.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? Sometimes, but sometimes not.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree? Let the kids take any ornaments that aren't fragile or sentimental and they cover the mid-section. I take care of the top third with those more breakable ornaments. The bottom tends to be sparse as whatever baby or toddler or dog has there way with the reject ornaments doomed for the lower branches.

11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? Mmmm, depends. I'll take the soft powdery stuff that makes for perfect play and sledding... the snow that melts quickly without much mess a day or so later. I dread icey, nasty sleet like snow.

12. Can you ice skate? If ice skating is like riding a bike, then, yes. If not, then no. I skated as a kid, but it's been a LONG time since I put skates on.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? No. Which is why I shouldn't worry too much about what I get our kids.

14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Jesus. Family. Traditions. In that order.

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? Red and Green Jello cake. Mmmmm.

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? We let the kids ages 4 and older sleep by the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve.

17. What tops your tree? A plastic lighted star-like Poinsettia. We bought it our first Christmas at the old Wal-mart. I LOVE it.

18. Which do you prefer giving or receiving? It is more fun to give as a general rule. Receiving isn't too shabby, either.

19. What is your favorite Christmas Song? All of the Christmas hymns are fabulous. Handel's Messiah is awesome to listen to, but I like to sing Away in the Manger to the kids.

20. Candy Canes: Yuck or Yum? MMMMmmmmm. Just ask Buddy the Elf... "We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns and syrup." But the fruit flavored ones are NASTY.

21 Favorite Christmas Show? Well as for show, I guess I do like to watch the Mormon Tabernacle Choir sing. It almost feels like a guilty pleasure. You can't beat "A Charlie Brown Christmas," or the animated "Grinch." My favorite movie is "White Christmas." Love the dancing and crooning.

22. Saddest Christmas Song? It's gotta be the one about the little boy wanting to buy the pretty new shoes for his dying mother... but he doesn't have much money, yadayada. Not a favorite of mine.

Hope this gets you in the Christmas spirit! Copy and post on your blog if you feel like spreading the Christmas cheer, or humbug, whichever your preference. :-) I got this off It's Almost Naptime, if you care to see her fun list.

Rested and thankful.

We have gotten into some sort of routine... and the stress of adjusting to a new family member (although temporary) has dissipated. Mr. F is truly a joy to have in our home. I am thankful to have the honor of being his foster mama... and am reminded there are blessings in obedience, even if it is hard work and takes us out of our comfort zone.

Last night, with tears pricking my eyes, I told Noah, "I'm going to be so sad when he leaves." Noah agreed.

But we both know that Mr. F belongs with his family... ideally, he will eventually live with his uncle and aunt in another state. One of Mr. F's sisters is in their care as well. He should grow up with his sister.

Oh, but he will be missed. Right now, we know his stay will at least be until mid-December. And who knows? It may last longer.

Our goal is for Mr. F to leave our home and be able to look back at his stay with a smile on his face. We want him to leave knowing what the love of Jesus looks like. To taste and see God's goodness.

Continued prayer is appreciated, as we wait to see what God has in store.

Happy Thanksgiving! Enjoy your family and be thankful for God's bountiful blessings... looking out from where I stand, there is so very much for which to be grateful.

Exhausted.

We are tired. Exhausted.

I think it's just the adjustment of having a new kid in the house. Just like any new addition... there is a period of learning "the new normal."

There is also the stress of the unknown.

When Mr. F came to us, it was as a temporary placement. Now, we face the possibility of this being a lengthier placement.

Plus, there is a TON of other stuff going on that weighs on this situation. We want what is best for Mr. F... this is all so unfair for him, he is a victim to adults' irresponsibility.

(And my website is broken, and I have a very important photo shoot on Tuesday, thanks to my friend Amber who has connections. So, broken website + important client = me stressing. But it's not life of death, so I shouldn't sweat it, right?)

If you think of it, pray for Mr. F on Monday, which also happens to be his birthday. Hopefully, some answers will be given on that day. This will likely leave Noah and I with some decisions to make. Pray for wisdom and peace all around. We need loads of it.

Seriously, folks... knowing what this child is facing makes me see how incredibly blessed we all are! Incredibly blessed.

Crazy Day

I dropped off the little ones at Tumble Tots this morning, and as I pulled back into my driveway, I got a call from my social worker. She needed to find a foster placement, and fast.

So, after much talking (and some quick praying), we said, "Yes."

I spent the rest of my day preparing, as our basement needed major cleaning, furniture moved, etc.

He arrived this afternoon. I will call him Mr. F since I can't really post much about him, name included.

Please be praying for us!!

Mr. F will turn 13 in a week. He is so far very pleasant and eager to get to know us. Noah is helping with his homework as I type.

This is supposed to be a temporary foster placement (a month)... so please pray God will enable us to minister to Mr. F in a mighty way, and that we can bless him in his life journey.

The Last of the Color

I love fall.
It is probably the prettiest of all seasons.
While I favor spring, I can't deny the beauty of the colors fall brings.

However, knowing in another week or two the leaves will be gone...

It's so depressing.

It will get cold.
It will be gray.
It will be dark.
And the only consolation is Christmas... which is then followed by 3 months of cold.

Hmmm. Maybe I need to move further south! St. John would be nice.

But then, there would be no fall leaves in St. John.
So, I suppose I should just go ahead and be thankful for all 4 seasons.
Even if one is unbearably cold. And gray. And dark.

A Pick-Me-Up

I'm in desperate need of something to cheer me up...
and what's better than looking at pictures of my happy children?
As I recall, there was some bad attitudes and arguing during this afternoon event,
but I'm going to pretend it was all smile and laughter.

These were taken in August. I miss warm weather already.

Sorrow.

Today, I received news that I truly wasn't expecting...

Just hours after I penned my last post (a few days ago), Daniel's birth mother passed away.

I am heartbroken.

It is difficult to articulate exactly all the emotions I feel.

Maybe if I had never met her, never hugged her, never seen her rock my Daniel as a baby, maybe then it wouldn't be so hard.

We did not have a rosey relationship... after all, during the months Daniel was our "foster son," it appeared we were on opposite sides.

They didn't want their son in foster care or adopted. We didn't want our son in danger or neglected.

His birth mother did love him. That I know.

I listened to her sobs as her parental rights were taken away.

God led me to hug her on the steps of the courthouse after the most difficult day in court. We cried together in our unnatural embrace. She held tightly onto me, as if I was her only friend. I promised to love Daniel, and keep him connected to his brother and sister. I had told her of her need for Jesus. That God was her only way out. She agreed.

That was the last time I ever saw her.

Now there are no more second chances. I pray that God has mercy on her.

I feel great guilt. Could I have done more? I feared endangering my children... that it was best to cut any ties.

She gave our sweet Daniel life. She chose life for him despite a culture that tells woman there is an easy way out. She gave my son the gift of life!

Yet, I cry at the loss of her own. She had lost every reason to try. Bad choices snowballed.

Now I wrack my brain trying to remember every conversation with her. The sound of her voice.

I am determined to keep my promise to her. I will do all I can to keep Daniel's birth siblings in his life. May the Lord open doors to help us keep and grow this very special connection.

......................................

My sweet Daniel, I know your birth mommy loved you. She just didn't know how to get the help she needed. She was blind to what children need... likely because she had never experienced love and stability in her short life. She lived a life of pain. But I know she loved you. The way she rocked you, and tried to console you when you cried. She would always end her visit with the words, "I love you," and plenty of kisses. When she knew her actions had caused her to lose you, she mourned. Her tears were real, and they were for you, my sweet boy. She knew, with us, you are abundantly loved and safe... I hope that brought her a glimmer of peace in her life.